For example, yesterday I opened up our enclosed patio Florida room since it is starting to reach the low 60's now. Had to of course pick off the dead stuff from the plants overwintering out there... The bunnies were happy to have company again!
And ol gal Stinker the cat was extremely happy that the sun was out and was the first to run into the FL room as soon as she heard me at the doors...
And even though I can't drink my regular beloved motivational coffee, I can still have some decaff... Which of course tastes best out of a hand thrown mug! And who doesn't love the swirlies from the creamer?
So I sit sometimes and wonder where did my creative self go? Why do I get so frustrated? Why feel so anxious? Yes, there are a lot of really cool things going on out there in blogland and in fellow artists studios... But my time now is here as a mom. At least until this little one doesn't need both or one of my arms constantly... Let that creative itch go unscratched for a bit longer. It's so frustrating though! Better time management may help too (and more sleep).
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sleep - as a mom of 3 - it is almost an outlandish yet simple request, isn't it? perhaps you can allow yourself to lay down when the baby does... i know i always had guilt because i 'should' be using that time for all kinds of other demands (that or the child was sleeping in a sling on me and i felt like i needed to keep moving)...
ReplyDeleteit is frustrating marsha... you will get there... maybe dave could give you a few hours? or do you have a mother's helper aged girl in your neighborhood to eek out just a little 'you' time? because depriving yourself of 'you' time for too long turns into a habit... i speak from experience...
i am actually planning a post on these conflicted feelings moms have... i am really struggling here as well... in a different way of course... look for a young teen - enjoy the sun on your face, the shoots coming up out of the ground... and know that you are thought about and cared for...
your creative self is there and getting antsy - it is an awful feeling... i start to feel like i am vibrating... things will look up... and do enjoy your babies - i know you treasure them...
and then there are those of us who wish we could be in your shoes right now.....you are living what life is all about! It's not sitting behind a desk 12 hours a day crunching numbers or listening to people constantly whining about their husbands or their commute to work....blah blah blah....its really become the white noise for me. The thought of holding tiny Riley or interacting with Chloe would be spectacular at this moment...I can understand being itchy for the studio, I haven't been in my work space for months, I miss it greatly. Stop and look at all the wonderfulness around you, your home, garden, studio and of course those precious two.... :) peace
ReplyDeleteI am thinking of you Miss Marsha! This too will pass...I can honestly say that with a 9 and 11-almost-12 year old running my life, just a different kind of running. I would say that you need to enjoy these little ones while you can. Your creativity will resurface when it is the right time. I have some regrets...that I wasn't there for all that littling time. You are blessed with healthy, happy wee ones. Go give them a hug for me, and a quick sniff of their little heads (they have the most wonderful scent). While you tend to the creative act of growing and cultivating little people (a VERY creative job!), know that there are those of us thinking of you. Wishing you well. Enjoy the day!
ReplyDeleteErin
Marsha, Redefine creative...
ReplyDeleteThink shapes and colors while nursing; plan garden spots while doing household tasks;
fall asleep with images of new clay; keep a pad nearby and doodle with one hand when you are holding Riley.. remember over and over that this is a little bit of time and a huge amount of time is before you.. It is a creative act to nurture children. The years 1-6 are the main shaping period.. you are exactly on the right track. Ask Dave for a spa afternoon and treat yourself. Best of luck, your are such a gifted gal nothing arty will evaporate.. Hugs, Joan T
A colleague of my husband's was showing me around her house; there was all kinds of beautiful art everywhere, all original, varied, and the lovely woman's own work. As I oohed and ahhed, she said, "well, my last creative act was giving birth."
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