Taking Time to Become Small Again

I have been in dire need to find my inspiration.

I'm usually pretty easy to entertain - I like a lot of things...

Today is officially the first warm day of spring that I have encountered.

Thank you sunshine and longer days for helping the garden start to emerge.

My friend Kim introduced me to blood root a few years ago.

It is so wonderful to see so early in it's growth.

The way the leaf hugs the emerging bloom is so expressive and warm feeling...

When I was a wee little girl I always thought there were small people around in just about every nook and cranny.

I would go into the garden and imagine that I was about 3" tall and would wander around in there within my head - and of course I could jump very high and fly if needed.

So to find my inspiration today,

I have taken a breath and jumped in again - just for a visit...

This is what I saw...

And something from my childhood...

From my Grandma Neal's old farm:

This old wooden thing...

I am not quite sure what is is used for.

My sister April thinks it was used with the horse saddles or bridles possibly.

We used to climb all over it and jump off of it.

I like the way it looks in my garden now,

and can't wait to see it within the garden as it comes into bloom...

Warm Fuzzies

I have always been in love with nature and with animals.

I especially loved my stuffed animals and toys as a young child.

I used to spend hours playing make believe with them.

Dave and I both really enjoy the holidays - and now with Chloe we can really get into them!

We had Chloe's picture taken with the Easter Bunny a couple weeks ago on a whim.

I hid (she is in a "mommy" phase now) while Dave took her to see Mr. Bunny...

This was one of the pictures I snapped of Dave being a goofy dad...

Needless to say I gave away my hiding place by laughing so much at the picture.

Oh, and Chloe wanted to stay with the Easter Bunny...

Last week we went to FL for a Disney vacation with Dave's family for the first part of the week, then my dad's family the last few days. Well, our first official day was spent at the Sarasota Memorial Hospital with Chloe. We went to visit granny there (Chloe's great grandmom), but Chloe was throwing up and was getting dehydrated, so we spent the entire day in the ER with her instead. This is her when we were leaving to drive back to the hotel - she was feeling much better after the medicine and fluids.

Monday was our Magic Kingdom Day. On the Ferry Boat ride to the Magic Kingdom, Chloe was standing up and she liked the way the rumbling of the boat made her feet vibrate. She sure has Dave's eye expressions - oh, those eyebrows!

I always wanted to get a job in Disney as one of the characters (one of the chipmunks preferably), but thought that it would be way too hot in that fur. So instead I just kept holding onto that love of my stuffed animals, and the fact that these living stuffed animals lived in Disney and really help make the experience super magical... I think Chloe is following the same path. She just melted into this character (playhouse Disney?) and didn't want to let go. And the people inside saw that and they really gave her a lot of attentions. Usually kids this little are way too freaked out to want to be near the characters. Not Chloe...

This picture is a bit blurry, but it was one of my favorites. I think I can see the happy in my eyes and knowing that Chloe was just hanging out on my shoulders looking around, trying to fight sleep while we were in the parks.

And on our final night, on our way out of the park (can I just comment that I was not a happy camper at this point. I have always hated not having "just another day" in the parks - with family. I miss being with my FL family every day, and I usually end up getting all teary and crying - such a mess sometimes...). Well, we were walking towards the exit of Epcot, and we just happened by where there were a bunch of the characters lined up and people were going in line and getting to see each and every one of them. Well Donald Duck (up to this very moment, my least favorite character - I can't stand the voice... but lucky for us, the actual people/ characters don't talk) saw Chloe and me looking in the window at them, and he came right over and put his hand up to the window, and Chloe put hers up to his, then he blew her kisses... It was such a moment. It was one of those "magical" moments when something just happens, and it makes everything seem all better and that you wish you could freeze it in time and just stay there in that perfect moment for just a bit longer.

So now that we're home, I'm happy to be home.

I'm delighted to see that my garden is starting to peek at me through the dreary soil.

The grass seems brighter green, and the trees are in bloom with flowers or with buds.

I have ideas for new work, but frankly, I feel no urge to make anything.

I want to clean. I want to de-clutter. I want to give myself a clean slate to work with.

So, I'm looking forward to getting an I-phone for my birthday/business to help with the de-cluttering of my technology side of procrastination. Once I get it, I will be able to upload things so much easier and then I will hopefully feel a bit more connected to the world outside of my house and procrastination piles that surround me in every room...

I hope that you are getting out too...

Warmer Weather = Opening of FL room

This past weekend it was in the mid 60's here in Northern Delaware.

The cats were frisky, and the warm breeze beckoned us to open up the doors, windows and get to unpacking and reorganizing our Florida Room.

Chloe loves being out in the FL room... and so do we!

The four big picture windows and two sliding doors really open it up as if you were outdoors, but with the comforts of being indoors.

Above & to the right is a hall seat from my Grandma Neal. It has been in our family for at least 5 generations. It was passed from my Great-Great Grandfather Fry to Great Grandmother Deaven to Grandma Neal to my dad to me. Also I inherited a bunch of old chairs this one is part of a set of 2.

My not so old hammock swing chair and Chloe's W.T.P. push toy (thank you Renu & Serita), chair 2 of 2, an old two-drawer stand, and coffee table with sides that pull up and lock (perfect game and puzzle table). This couch is from Dave's grandmom's house. I think I may be the only person in our family to really see the beauty in this couch. And in true Italian fashion, I believe it had the plastic on it until recent years... So I am happy to say, Thank You to Mrs. Zambino for keeping it under plastic - it is in perfect condition, and is the most comfortable lounge couch ever!

Grandmom Zambino's Italian Lounge Couch and an Antique Blue Chair from my Great Grandma Deaven's house. This chair has a twin and a couch that I am told are lavender in color. I'm not quite sure who got those in the family, but they are around (I hope). I remember this chair from when I was very small. I used to run my fingers all over the designs cut into the material. It is the kind of chair that when you sit into it, you sink back into it - the seat is very long and it's quite bouncy (perfect for little kids to sit in with feet sticking out, and bounce, bounce, bounce). And in the back of the I.L.C. is a very old and very cool Tiffany style lamp which was to my surprise - very, very heavy.

I have decided (and Dave has accepted - at least for now) that the FL room is the place for us to put a lot of these old pieces of furniture. Our garage is full up to the brim of items from 4 other houses - all here because of a loss of sorts. My mom and Dave's grandmom have passed on and two of my grandmom's have downsized and moved to a warmer location geographically. And all within the last year and a half.

It's a weird feeling of loss to have so many of our maternal figures not with us anymore on a regular basis. So I am feeling the need to surround us with things of theirs for now. I know that Dave hopes to get rid of a lot of things - and we will... I only want to keep the things we can put out around the house (& seasonal stuff to put out). And the rest should go to people that would enjoy them as well.

So - maybe I'll open an Etsy shop for the cool "vintage" things I come across that family members don't want. There is some cool crap in those boxes...

I can't believe what grandma's keep locked up in storage...

Small Things Around The House

Some days I think I may be a little insane.

It is usually when I am loading a glaze kiln and am not in the mood to do it...

The picture above is looking down three rods full of the small earring size pendants that I loaded yesterday. Every piece has to be suspended on these little hooks so that the entire piece  can be glazed without any sharp spots.

As I finished loading the kiln, I quick did a look over to make sure that nothing was touching, and one of these pieces dropped down to the bottom.

This meant that I had to get a small wire and try to fish that one small piece out without knocking any more off. I kept thinking - this is like playing that game "Operation" where you used small tweezers to get out the game pieces without touching the sides to avoid that annoying buzzing sound...

I did manage to get that single piece without much issue. But I can't help but to think there is a much better way to load and fire kilns - especially the smaller pieces. So my brain is in that mode to come up with something that I can load small pieces fast and easy (not quite so easy when you consider all the parameters: the rods/wire sag at a certain temp. Weight and space is also a factor). 

And of course, after a trying few hours of loading kilns - I've got my little helper around to get the house stuff done (although, she usually makes more of a mess than she cleans...).

It's these small things around the house that keep me going day to day...

Buridan's Ass: decisions actually...

Ok, thinking a bit more about Burdain's Ass brings me to the conclusion that I won't "starve" because my life will be fulfilled with being a mom, being a wife, being an artist (of sorts), being a friend, and all the other things that I want in my life...

I have decided and without really realizing it... Now I just have to be conscious about the decisions I make and how they affect my being a wife and mom. I have taken certain steps in my life to get to this point and I am very satisfied with them. I don't live through regrets or second guesses. 

I welcome the realizations that come with making mistakes (may not like the consequences though).

So my choice is to put efforts forth to make sure that I don't overwhelm myself and by putting my small family unit before all else as often as possible. And with that, it is time for me to get into the studio and start to work on pendants & orders so I can have time later to dedicate myself to Chloe & visiting with family and not worrying about all the "business" stuff I need to do.

Thanks for reading my venting... Motivation is here, and along with some coffee and sunshine outside - is here to stay for the next few hours...

Buridan's Ass

Today my sister April and I were sitting and talking while Chloe was napping and we happened across a book on Philosophical Ideas that you should be familiar with. And Buridan's Ass was one of the ideas that struck a note within me . It describes exactly where I am right now (except that I'm not going to starve...). I have a lot of stuff to do, but can't decide where to start, so nothing is getting done.

Then I think. I am at a crossroads in my life. Being a mom has taken priority for me over making my porcelain pendants. Tucson made me realize this. I love being with my beady friends, but missing out on time with Dave and Chloe made me come to the conclusion that I only have so much time to be a mom. And right now - that is where my heart is.

Don't get me wrong... I still want to make stuff - but I want to take my work past just the technical side of working with clay. I want to combine my passion for working with plants, observing wildlife, and watching Chloe grow and discover into my work. Now I have to discover how to make that happen...