Blogging and participating in blogging events helps keep me motivated to try new things.
Something I find helpful when working in a home studio and not socializing as much as I'm used to.
I've admired Andrew Thornton's posts for his Self Portrait Fridays (of which he has taken a break from).
The origination of the Self Portrait Fridays comes from Nina Bagley's Blog: Ornamental
Looking at myself in the mirror, I don't recognize the person that is standing there…
Something I find helpful when working in a home studio and not socializing as much as I'm used to.
I've admired Andrew Thornton's posts for his Self Portrait Fridays (of which he has taken a break from).
The origination of the Self Portrait Fridays comes from Nina Bagley's Blog: Ornamental
Looking at myself in the mirror, I don't recognize the person that is standing there…
But maybe in a photograph I will...
Where has this person that I am seeing come from?
I find that I am rarely in front of the camera.
Somewhat because I'm not happy with my outer appearance.
And I am usually the one with the camera in hand.
So I decided to finally just sit down and take some pictures...
I can feel the smile - and what that looks like because that one thing I am rarely without...
And the rolls of fat that have accumulated over the last 10 to 15 years…
I hate the feeling of them, of the sweat accumulated there in the summer…
I loathe summer because of it.
Well, fat sweat and mosquitos...
But even those, albeit uncomfortable to feel - the fat, not the smile…
Make me who I am…
At least on the outside...
I am going to try to look inward and take pictures to express that...
The fat is what happens when you become a shell of yourself when overwhelmed at what life throws at you.
Good (like real Italian food from a family that loves to eat… and eat… and eat)
Bad (losing my mom to Leukemia 3 years ago)
Both Good and Bad (my work selling well = lots of sitting work = bad eating habits & less exercise)
So now is the time for me to look at this person I have become and figure out what in life she wants…
It is a time in my life of great change and many things happening...
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| Chloe painting. Summer 2010. |
I want to paint…
I should take lessons from my two year old daughter on that one…
I actually think I might!
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| Chloe painting the wall tile at Longwood Gardens. |
She adores painting - with anything!
And she is so much like me…
in the little details and quirks…
And I am so much like my parents…
qualities of both…
And she is developing the sense of humor & whit of her father…
And he is rubbing off on me a bit too - at least the laughter part…
Dave allows me to smile and find happiness within myself…
He is such an amazing person…
I hope by finding out who I am, and who I want to be - I can help him do the same…
Or at least give him the tools he needs to relax and enjoy life a bit more...
I like the pictures you took of yourself. It hasn't been until I reached my 30s that I started looking more at who I am and who I want to be. It has been a work in progress, but I can see progress and that is heartening. Good for you Marsha, you can do this!
ReplyDeleteI agree that the person I see in the mirror or in photos is not the person I feel inside. Your photos are beautiful!
ReplyDeleteI am almost 50 (just over 2 months to go!) and still have not become completely who I want to be. But that could be because my vision for myself is constantly evolving. I have achieved and gone beyond some of my original visions of who I want to be, and that is great!
I too come from a family who loves to eat too much Italian foods... and the skinny person I feel like does not show up in the photos... she's hiding!
I find peace and contentment from creating, especially my pottery, but also my jewelry and paper arts.
You are so lucky to have your husband and children to help nourish your soul.
I don't recognize the person I see in the mirror at all. She's not the person I see in my mind.
ReplyDeleteBut I look at my son and everything is ok!
Isn't it sad that we as women take so long to feel comfortable in our own skin? That we cave into the societal pressures of someone else's idea of beauty and are so hard on ourselves? I'm 44 and finally becoming comfortable in mine and have stopped running from the camera as often.
ReplyDeleteI could go on and on about the bags under my eyes, wrinkles, a zit here or there or how one eyelid seems to droop in every photo or God forbid my big back side and why I don't want my photo taken. But then I realized I was basically cutting myself out of my family's or friend's photographic history. I started to think how sad it would be for my kids to open a photo album someday after I'm long gone and not have any family photo's with me in them. That made me feel foolish for having been so hard on myself all these years and to put an end to that behavior.
Love the photos! As for exercise, having 2 babies should help with that! I don't think we ever stop evolving, and that is a good thing. I remember my mom saying (when she was over 80) that when she looked in a mirror, she wondered who that old lady was.
ReplyDeleteIts a shame that you deprive yourself of recognizing the beauty I get to see daily.
ReplyDeleteIf you insist on avoiding the mirror, see the beauty in the reflection of our kid's smiling eyes.
You guys are beauty!
ReplyDelete